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There was once a .. Sad love story Same old story Beloved Letter Love Letter View from the window Looking back Remember the scene Moonlight A walk in the forest With the wind On the way Till I find you The moment Autumn scene Shining smile Time forgets Wait there When the love falls I .. Nothing to say (Just wanna say) .. Hope Be my first Sunny rain Kiss the rain .. But all these I knew .. was just a Dream Destiny of Love Tears on love I cry for love I yearn for this love So much I'd die for .. Falling Maybe If I could see you again .. Before this Farewell My memory .. Only you .. Do you Love me Promise .. our same word .. As you wish Because I love you Poem Spread your wings and fly Fly up high and reach the sky There's nothing you cannot achieve if you try So keep pressing on, fly, fly, fly One day I will .. Leave behind .. the past.

Diagnosed with "synus infection" . Didn't go to school today. Totally glued to my bed. Thankfully, the doc's medicine really relieved me and I got study! :O And since this is one of the RAREST fridays I ever got time to study, I've got more time to study!! YES!!! :DD PRAISE THE LORD! (: Managed to make a commitment/agreement with Him yesterday if he let me rest today. And so, I gotta work even harder since I've got more time to study. Hoping to do better than last term.. Just hope the questions are not too hard >. Gotta learn how to apply my knowledge and the theory to the questions cos I think it might be like last term's chemistry paper - it was 60% application questions. *Faints*. I guess that paper just got be out of bed and wide awake to see & to be prepared for/expect more of these kinda things to happen. And to answer them, I can't be totally narrow-minded about it. Questions will soon be a never-straight-forward type anymore. Sighs. I mi...

SICKSICKSICK. -sighs- Terrible sneezing and all that stuff. yepp.. Hmm.. Many things going through tomorrow. And I'm not sure whether I might be able to go school tomorrow or not. I don't know which side to take, to go or not to go? Because I dread fridays. I hate tomorrow. and I'm sick. I don't wanna go to school heavy-headed .. sighs. But then again, I can't say I hate tomorrow even though it's a tyical every-week-friday-hate feeling because there's always bound to be a sense of not-liking fridays the day before friday aka thursday. And every thursday I always made sure I make full use of it before I meet my doom the next day. Then again, I can't and am NOT suppose to be predicting these kind of things. How can I predict that tomorrow will be a day I will not like like the past many many fridays? God can make the impossible possible. & it's because he can make tomorrow's impossible, possible. I'd be dancing the whole day, seriously . ...

可爱万岁!!

Studying mode switch officially 'ON'! Planned to study today. But it looks like I can only read through my geography notes. Hmmm .. Had e-learning day today = staying at home and doing online assignments. Had difficulty with the "bearings" quiz and .. well.. difficulty with finding the ss assignment -.-" Sighs. ss assignment is 5% and I am so reluctant to do it. 5% SO does NOT fit the right percentage of motivation -.- Had cca after e-learning day. I don't really think there is much to say though. Well, just tired and still trying to get rid of my headache ._.

I stare in awe with my mouth hanging wide open ..

我不配 ..

I LOVE THE WEATHER!! :DD Lately the weather has been "encouraging" me in many ways and also made me kinda relaxed and sleepy. HAHA! yeh! goodbye to insomnia, HELLOW BEAUTY SLEEP!! :DD Today was pretty much the most slackiest, most reckless, most lethargic day ever. Why reckless? Simple. My class was just pretty loose and just didn't wanna do anything. Didn't wanna listen, or whatsoever. Interrupting teachers' sentences, shouting, talking despite the repeated warnings the teachers gave today. Everyone was just.. well, our souls.. and bodies were there. Just not our brains to pay attention =x Alrightalright. Enough. Hmm.. After I came home - skipping the tuition I initially wanted to go for (help out), only because I have a valid reason!! - I spent time with my family (: It was one of the rarest - RAREST DAYS, I SAY - that my whole family is together. AWAKE, AT HOME. Even though it was a few moments - cos my sis went to sleep after coming home and bathe, then str...

It's been hours and hours since I've put on a big smile on my face .. PRAISE BE TO GOD! (: Yesterday my mom had an operation and she was still kinda weak, but she still could joke. She was on painkillers. She looked so weak, my dad showed so much of his overconcerning side of him towards my mom. Even when my sis and I tried to act as normal as possible. I don't know about my sis, but seeing my mom so weak really squeezes my heart real tight. The feeling's as if like I should be the one there - not her. The last time I saw her so weak was when she had really bad bad stomachaches. It was so bad til she couldn't get out of bed and she wouldn't dare to move. It was so bad I thought I might cry any moment. But gladly, this operation was successful and my mom's getting better - speedy recovery in fact! (: Today she need not put in the Sodium Chloride (I just found out that it's SALT. watched jimmy neutron before visiting my mom. I know I know. HOW O...

It's stuck in my head.

I wish to post everything here, but I'm too lazy. Read my tumblr .. Anyways, here's a video my sis showed me. hahs. it's cute and funny (:

.. But special for you .. Shriveled leaves Casted away by the winds How pleasant it deceives The ending it rescinds Withering skies Traverse the ever light of life Like a person in disguise living a life full of strife Souless beings on the ground Some begging for mercy Hoped to be found Hoped for democracy Strong waves with merciless attacks Filling empty ever-drying cracks Which on the floor near the sea reaching some who cried out in plea But no one knew a hero within it's something they have to do To create a spark, letting the fire burn to let it begin Because no one knows In the motionless; stillness There a little spark of hope glows In its weariness.

So many things, all at one go. God, can I take it? How can I control? It's probably one of the most craziest day I've ever lived. Family matters are bursting my lungs out and I can't deal with it. I know. I would've asked for advice if I would want to hear a logical/emotional response from the other side. But .. maybe for once I don't . Because right now, all I wanna hear is that I'm right. It's probably because I'm too overwhelmed by too many things. All arrows shooting to the target; my heart. For crying out loud, I would not even want to go for cca anymore. I feel so depressed and demoralised. Where is justice? I nearly let out a tear in anger while spilling everything out to my mom again while she was on her way to fetch my sis. Just after spilling it all out only to find out an almost ignorant answer - though I know she's really busy driving, my timing really sucks when I try to telling people things, that's why I'm mostly never heard of...

A little upset .. I found out a little something about yesterday - after school. I'm very very upset. Though I feel a sense of burden is lifted, the scales weigh more towards me being very upset that it was cancelled. After talking to my sis about it, she's right. I gotta go talk to the principal. with guof. and keely. There's something we should do about it. It's a reward we've been trying to achieve for. Teachers cannot help us neither can lao shi. P. might get a little offended and they might be fired the next day. They don't have a right to "protest" and make a stand. But we do. We have every right to do so. We're students in this school afterall. After all the efforts we've put in, cancelling on us is the worst option they chose. We've been in guzheng for 8 years now. Not a single year we've been able to go abroad. Not once. We've achieved the best awards. All we ask for is a little reward from the school. Why is it that we al...

Stay. Words down here I've written Worth a million tears but hoping to be forgotten The unbearable yet satisfying hidden deep within what's this feeling? A nucleus controlling the cell Couldn't move, think or rebel My heart roams wherever it deems, wherever it'll feel happy, it seems That night at my house A something you dropped at the front door Reaching for it with high hopes Only to find a picture And letter. The most painful Yet memoriable memories My sweet caramel Finally brushed off after all Bitter as cud Bitter tears streamed down my cheeks Quietly my heart screams and cries overflowing crimson-coloured liquid leaks Here, collecting myself gathering lost pieces of my heart that was ripped apart Still I kept the photo Of you and me this act I could never control A fool i am; how silly.

Sighs. Stomachaches, bad bad stomacheaches T-T Just came back home after seeing a doc. Found out that it was just wind. phew -.-" Still, as minor as the problem may seem to be, stupid stomachaches are really "strong" .. Currently stopped at episode 72 for BLEACH yesterday. .. I wanted to post a picture here. However, my blogger despises me right now and refuses to do as I command it to. sighs. blogger .. nowadays .. sigh.

Thank God again! :DD About an hour plus ago, I received news that my teach was sick today and therefore, ARTS lesson is cancelled. Would like to pray that she gets well soon. But also rejoice for God has given to me a very relaxing day today!! :D Indeed there are many things that I can and should be giving thanks to God for. It's just that sometimes during QT, when I start off with my prayer after the word, it's like, i have nothing to give thanks for. But right now, I guess I can start by being thankful for the most little things in life to be grateful for. Even to see my parents leading a healthy lifestyle - still quite worried for my dad though and mom a little too - would be a great blessing itself (: Hmm .. I'd like to address something .. a point to put across .. hmm .. what was it again .......??! OH! yeh, I just remembered. What's wrong with watching anime? It seems that I sense my sister either not trusting me that I'd be able to resist the temptation of - ...

GOD ANSWERED MY "PRAYER"!! It's pretty sudden and all .. well .. Just now in the car, while my mom sent auntie suet fong home - after dropping her colleague (or friend?) at the mrt there i think) i was worried. I was so anxious. But remembered in my previous post I mentioned about God helping me? Yes, indeed. He assured me something that i was .. well, thought I could actually feel okay with it, and I felt yes, I can go through tomorrow. after school, cca then my doom/another big blow? or guzheng lesson at ARTS. I felt contented. a little more than contented though. And now? here Keely smsed me saying that cca is cancelled tomorrow! YES!! YES!! YES!! Not only did he assured me, but he helped me further on as well! God is great! He's awesome!! OH MY, I don't know what to say. After reading it all, some of you may be wondering, so what? cca cancelled. that's all. but it's not just that. it means a LOT to me. not implying the reason that I hate ccas .. I gues...

SPAM HOMEWORK!! >:O And the trees hushed, Don't cry, my love For whom we find comfort In the one up above. Morning's function was pretty much like a sponge for me to absorb all the information from my teachers which unfortunately, went brain dead - or too bloated - and soon dragged my eyes into the ring of visual learning terror. Was pretty tired 'cos.. well, late nights I guess. During geography lesson, the whole of the first row, joined their heads to their tables. so classic! and i was the only one surviving - apparently. But I collapsed soon enough and teach finally gave us a 5-minute break. It was kinda weird that during that short period of time, I actually SLEPT , and still able to DREAM!! Yesyes, I was pretty much shocked myself .. After school, went to macs with zoey and anna for lunch before heading back home to bring orlie out and to anna's house to do math homework. apparently it was almost like.. a study + play + enjoying ourselves moment .. balance of ...

Ego isleep ihear iwakeup iyawn iwear ibrush idrink iwear icarry iwalk ilock iwalk iwait iwalk isit ieat ialmostdozeoff iwalk isit iputdownbag iwalk icarrybook iwalk isit ilisten iyawn ilisten irespond italk iyawn ilisten iread igetup iwalk iwalkupstairs iwalk isit ilisten ................................ & so many more I don't bother listing it all out -.- too tired. Yesterday had barely 4 hours of sleep yesterday. My eyes are so dry now that I'd be yawning everytime i open my mouth wide open - even when im talking. Apparently today was quite relaxing .. almost TOO relaxing. Thank God (: During chinese lesson I almost dozed off though -.-" couldn't take it and francine aka my new seat partner was being too fed up with lao shi for always forgetting to give our group points then we'd always have to leave the classroom with the whiteboard scores as ours, the lowest. Honestly, I don't think I even care about the points anymore. It's the learning that counts...

Got back on my feet and time to face the storm of doom. Now that camp's over, I gotta finish up my homework for the rest of the week!! GAHH!! blow wind blow!! *tornado comes and spins me into the doom of spamming homework* oh wells. better get going :/

The day the monster reveals itself. The title says it all. Luke, I will put that into consideration. But when I did not say who it was, it was definitely on purpose, you should know that. The reason that I don't want any best friends now is because I'm trying my best to limit them. I'm not "getting rid" of all of them. I'm just saying I want to stick to the best friends i've known for years now. For it's only them that they can truly understand my situation and how I react to things and therefore, helping me with my change. I sound absurd to many. I know that. I've broken far too many hearts - and I know that. But you might be wondering why am I doing it again, and so much more harsher that even some of my other best friend(s) are scared? It goes back to the reason. And I shan't go on further because I gtg, bye. Sorry and I hope you understand what this monster is talking.

Yes, the awesomest camp ever. But when I got home and saw what i DID NOT WANT TO SEE , I guess i nearly flared up. Lost my appetite. The lunch that I bought, Right in front of me yet I refuse to open my mouth just to consume some energy to revive my lifeless being. You broke y our promise. You ALWAYS behaved that way. My feelings now are stretched to its limit, Though I'm trying to hold it back. I'm trying to resist from typing all those nasty things I wish I could type it out. Or say it out. But it seems like this self-control that I was practicing in camp is really paying off. Yeah. it's paying off. Paying off, in exchange for an arrow in my heart. yeah. it's feeling great.