Chun Dao Xiang Jiang? Mo Li Feng Fang? Stupid? Blur? Yes? No?
captured . blurred vision . blackout .
I'm gonna say something I've never told anyone . yet . But anyways,
like as IF, I'm gonna write in FULL detail . no thanks .
Like an insect, caught in a spider web . stuck . and cannot escape .
I feel like that . Well, I've gotten back my results today ..
Oh and Saul, remember I told u I'd be flunkin' geography and history?
I passed those . Though not with flying colours, but amazingly, I passed .
The easiest paper that I thought it was for the entire examination,
I FLUNKED THAT . I probably had made it to the lowest 10 in
class for it .
I passed the rest of the subjects . Um.. meaning Literature, Geography,
History and DnT . Well, the other papers will be released on Thursday .
Why Thursday and NOT tomorrow? That's just cos it's my school's
founders' day ((:
Well, though I had actually PUT a smiley face there, it actually meant that
it was just a GREAT opportunity for me to take a nap -.-
The speeches will be long, the prize presentation will be long, everything
will be long and will last till 12pm . OHMYGAWSH -.-
I've made up my mind, I've chosen to play mo li feng fang . After the
30-minute talk between my Lao shi (THUM) and I . I was really really..
woken . Just woken up from my nightmare . I'd realised that despite the
many unreasonable acts he'd done to me and my mates, he takes note of
everyone in guzheng tuan . He'd realised I was sensitive . HE BARELY
EVEN HAD THIS KINDA TALKS WITH ME .. uh.. I think =x
But anyways, I found out that, even though he's turning senile, he's
becoming more fatherly . I'm feeling kinda freaked out because it's like ..
I'm looking up to him as a father .. more than a teacher . NOT THAT I'M
GONNA CALL HIM DAD OR 'BABA' . DUH . NO . As in, his tone is firm
but polite when he spoke to me . Just like my dad . Advices just flow from
their mouths . It's like .. just almost the same . Just that, LOGICALLY,
my DAD is my uh.. LOGICAL AND BIOLOGICAL DAD .
OK .. enough of that . I'd like to describe two words today . Just to end of
the post . just in case someone did not know what she has and had ALWAYS
been doing .
DISCRIMINATION :
1) An act or instance of discriminating.
2) Treatment or consideration of, or making a distinction in favor of or against, a person or thing based on the group, class, or category to which that person or thing belongs rather than on individual merit: racial and religious intolerance and discrimination.
3) The power of making fine distinctions; discriminating judgment: She chose the colors with great discrimination.
4) Archaic. something that serves to differentiate.
5) Treatment or consideration based on class or category rather than individual merit; partiality or prejudice: racial discrimination; discrimination against foreigners.
My sis said, "It just means to think and do/say something. To judge that something/someone and sort of a 'looking down on' thing. For example, 'that girl is a bitch,' she said. This girl in the 'she said' is the person discriminating the 'that girl'."
Even though you said it was just to express your feelings, I feel that .. it's not longer ur blog to express your feelings . But rather, a blog that discriminates me . "honestly, grace is much better", in small fonts . Was one of the small sentence I found in one of ur posts . Since you were guilty, u said u'd delete it off . When someone says something, as a friend, I expect that person to keep their word . And now? Even after I'd forgiven you, u still left it there . You're just making empty promises . I really don't mind u getting angry at me . It's natural . I know . But have you ever even considered my feelings? Whenever I adviced you, u felt it was much of a "scolding" . I may have done so, sometimes . but at least I did not do it publicly . I SAVED YOUR DIGNITY . Must I always make everything so direct to you that you'd understand? No .. whenever I do so, you'd say I'd be scolding you . The truth always hurts you . At least when u want to speak up your mind . you COULD be nicer . It was so obvious as if like I was that DUMB not to even understand a single word you would say if u'd say it normally . Actually, I don't think u've ever done that . You should really start thinking before you say .
When you said, "Now I know why people dislike you." in my sms . Don't u think u actually hurt me? I'm not some ROBOT that is programmed to help u and concentrate on only YOU . I AM HUMAN . I HAVE A LIFE . I HAVE FEELINGS . I'M A PERFECTIONIST . I'M SENSITIVE TOO . All along, all this while, I've been trying to be strong . trying to influence you to be strong too. But if u continue to be a stubborn, hard-headed person, WHAT CAN I DO? Each time u sent those type of smses . I was deeply hurt . I've been suffering in the whole friendship . You just didn't know . I CRIED each time u do that . Just like when I mentioned the vulgarity word when u were so stressed with ur work, studying . That u cried .
Today, when u were talking to me, U finally heard it . U finally understood . That my problem was much worse . Urs was a short while . At most a few weeks . Me? 9 months plus . You heard me on the phone . You heard me loud and clear . Today was just the first day that I release the sadness in me that I've been holding in during the NINE MONTHS .
I read that post, you daoed me . "I'm waiting impatiently" was the sms, "Live life to the fullest with vienna", discriminated me in public in ur blog, my mum called me stupid and blur, my sis made fun of me in the same way, my stupid teacher made me change songs, I stopped the best friend friendship, u became so angry u discriminated me and made me feel even more idiotic, the word "mature.." echoes in my head all the time . You daoed me . I'M TRYING MY BEST NOT TO DO THE SAME .
I'm not gonna end up discriminating you . Otherwise I'd just be like you . resulting back to my old self, the insensitive, introvert, emo gal . That's where I came from . Jealousy was the theme of my life . no, my PAST life . I made the decision already . So that's off the list . When u talked to me and gave me the sms, this is my reply, "Why, why should I reply? Why should I even be heeding your advice? HOW CAN I TRUST U AGAIN?" And then in my mind, I now know why your mum is always so angry with you . u should start to be more sensitive towards people . Even when things are at the peak, climax . Don't tell me when u go working, u're not happy with ur boss when YOUR BOSS DISCRIMINATES YOU . He'll FIRE you . I'm teaching you something u should be learning .. not ignore the advices I give u . and stick to urself . You said I was immature .. but really, if I was, really was immature, I'd long ago, beat u up in public . That's how violent I really am .
PREJUDICE:
1) unreasonable feelings, opinions, or attitudes, esp. of a hostile nature, regarding a racial, religious, or national group.
My sis said, "Thinking of the unpleasant opinion, but not saying it out."
I'll give u two examples .
Example 1:
My friends and I were on our way to my house for a big celebration for the end of exams . Then, I saw this disgusting, filthy guy that just sat right in front of my house, looking like he was waiting for someone . I shouted, "HEY! GO AWAY YOU BASTARD, HOW DARE U STAND IN FRONT OF MY HOUSE . CAN U ALSO PLEASE GO TAKE A BATH OR SOMETHING? U STINK!" My friends stopped walking and stared at me with their jaws wide open .
Example 2:
Brenda and I were on our way to meet Chelsea to start on our project work project . Then, when we saw her, walked to her, exchanged greetings, we both started to smell something gross . And when Chelsea was leading the way, Brenda turned to me, frowned and pinched her nose . When we arrived at her doorstep, Chelsea, being the positive and cheery type of person, turned around and said, "hey, my house is kinda in a mess, so bear with it a little, yeah?" we both nodded our heads . I mean, from all the friends' houses I've been to, they always say that they're houses are very messy, I mean, it's just typical, I mean, how bad could it be? But to our horror, we saw filth and some cockroaches everywhere and a strong stench . I thought, "This is the worst place I've ever been to! oh my gawd -.-"
Just tell me, which is discrimination? which is prejudice? There's a big difference . But I tell u now, it's better to be prejudice towards someone than to discriminate someone, in YE, I remembered Auntie Kar Foon said that the Tongue, the power of the tongue, is strong . It can build one's confidence, or bring it down . It also applies to emotions . But not discriminating and prejudice is much better than to be prejudice against someone .
Both words have negative terms . They are Sin . the power of the mind and tongue . And now u know, how much u've hurt me . even though I hurt u the last part of the friendship . that'd probably last a few weeks . And who knows? U may continue to discriminate me on ur blog forever . But it's okay now, I'm never gonna visit ur blog again . Because whenever I did, all I saw was either a complaint or a discrimination about me .
I figured I could choose to make myself remain happy or become sad and have ur posts ruin my day . I pick the second option . I'm going my way now . shut up .
captured . blurred vision . blackout .
I'm gonna say something I've never told anyone . yet . But anyways,
like as IF, I'm gonna write in FULL detail . no thanks .
Like an insect, caught in a spider web . stuck . and cannot escape .
I feel like that . Well, I've gotten back my results today ..
Oh and Saul, remember I told u I'd be flunkin' geography and history?
I passed those . Though not with flying colours, but amazingly, I passed .
The easiest paper that I thought it was for the entire examination,
I FLUNKED THAT . I probably had made it to the lowest 10 in
class for it .
I passed the rest of the subjects . Um.. meaning Literature, Geography,
History and DnT . Well, the other papers will be released on Thursday .
Why Thursday and NOT tomorrow? That's just cos it's my school's
founders' day ((:
Well, though I had actually PUT a smiley face there, it actually meant that
it was just a GREAT opportunity for me to take a nap -.-
The speeches will be long, the prize presentation will be long, everything
will be long and will last till 12pm . OHMYGAWSH -.-
I've made up my mind, I've chosen to play mo li feng fang . After the
30-minute talk between my Lao shi (THUM) and I . I was really really..
woken . Just woken up from my nightmare . I'd realised that despite the
many unreasonable acts he'd done to me and my mates, he takes note of
everyone in guzheng tuan . He'd realised I was sensitive . HE BARELY
EVEN HAD THIS KINDA TALKS WITH ME .. uh.. I think =x
But anyways, I found out that, even though he's turning senile, he's
becoming more fatherly . I'm feeling kinda freaked out because it's like ..
I'm looking up to him as a father .. more than a teacher . NOT THAT I'M
GONNA CALL HIM DAD OR 'BABA' . DUH . NO . As in, his tone is firm
but polite when he spoke to me . Just like my dad . Advices just flow from
their mouths . It's like .. just almost the same . Just that, LOGICALLY,
my DAD is my uh.. LOGICAL AND BIOLOGICAL DAD .
OK .. enough of that . I'd like to describe two words today . Just to end of
the post . just in case someone did not know what she has and had ALWAYS
been doing .
DISCRIMINATION :
1) An act or instance of discriminating.
2) Treatment or consideration of, or making a distinction in favor of or against, a person or thing based on the group, class, or category to which that person or thing belongs rather than on individual merit: racial and religious intolerance and discrimination.
3) The power of making fine distinctions; discriminating judgment: She chose the colors with great discrimination.
4) Archaic. something that serves to differentiate.
5) Treatment or consideration based on class or category rather than individual merit; partiality or prejudice: racial discrimination; discrimination against foreigners.
My sis said, "It just means to think and do/say something. To judge that something/someone and sort of a 'looking down on' thing. For example, 'that girl is a bitch,' she said. This girl in the 'she said' is the person discriminating the 'that girl'."
Even though you said it was just to express your feelings, I feel that .. it's not longer ur blog to express your feelings . But rather, a blog that discriminates me . "honestly, grace is much better", in small fonts . Was one of the small sentence I found in one of ur posts . Since you were guilty, u said u'd delete it off . When someone says something, as a friend, I expect that person to keep their word . And now? Even after I'd forgiven you, u still left it there . You're just making empty promises . I really don't mind u getting angry at me . It's natural . I know . But have you ever even considered my feelings? Whenever I adviced you, u felt it was much of a "scolding" . I may have done so, sometimes . but at least I did not do it publicly . I SAVED YOUR DIGNITY . Must I always make everything so direct to you that you'd understand? No .. whenever I do so, you'd say I'd be scolding you . The truth always hurts you . At least when u want to speak up your mind . you COULD be nicer . It was so obvious as if like I was that DUMB not to even understand a single word you would say if u'd say it normally . Actually, I don't think u've ever done that . You should really start thinking before you say .
When you said, "Now I know why people dislike you." in my sms . Don't u think u actually hurt me? I'm not some ROBOT that is programmed to help u and concentrate on only YOU . I AM HUMAN . I HAVE A LIFE . I HAVE FEELINGS . I'M A PERFECTIONIST . I'M SENSITIVE TOO . All along, all this while, I've been trying to be strong . trying to influence you to be strong too. But if u continue to be a stubborn, hard-headed person, WHAT CAN I DO? Each time u sent those type of smses . I was deeply hurt . I've been suffering in the whole friendship . You just didn't know . I CRIED each time u do that . Just like when I mentioned the vulgarity word when u were so stressed with ur work, studying . That u cried .
Today, when u were talking to me, U finally heard it . U finally understood . That my problem was much worse . Urs was a short while . At most a few weeks . Me? 9 months plus . You heard me on the phone . You heard me loud and clear . Today was just the first day that I release the sadness in me that I've been holding in during the NINE MONTHS .
I read that post, you daoed me . "I'm waiting impatiently" was the sms, "Live life to the fullest with vienna", discriminated me in public in ur blog, my mum called me stupid and blur, my sis made fun of me in the same way, my stupid teacher made me change songs, I stopped the best friend friendship, u became so angry u discriminated me and made me feel even more idiotic, the word "mature.." echoes in my head all the time . You daoed me . I'M TRYING MY BEST NOT TO DO THE SAME .
I'm not gonna end up discriminating you . Otherwise I'd just be like you . resulting back to my old self, the insensitive, introvert, emo gal . That's where I came from . Jealousy was the theme of my life . no, my PAST life . I made the decision already . So that's off the list . When u talked to me and gave me the sms, this is my reply, "Why, why should I reply? Why should I even be heeding your advice? HOW CAN I TRUST U AGAIN?" And then in my mind, I now know why your mum is always so angry with you . u should start to be more sensitive towards people . Even when things are at the peak, climax . Don't tell me when u go working, u're not happy with ur boss when YOUR BOSS DISCRIMINATES YOU . He'll FIRE you . I'm teaching you something u should be learning .. not ignore the advices I give u . and stick to urself . You said I was immature .. but really, if I was, really was immature, I'd long ago, beat u up in public . That's how violent I really am .
PREJUDICE:
1) unreasonable feelings, opinions, or attitudes, esp. of a hostile nature, regarding a racial, religious, or national group.
My sis said, "Thinking of the unpleasant opinion, but not saying it out."
I'll give u two examples .
Example 1:
My friends and I were on our way to my house for a big celebration for the end of exams . Then, I saw this disgusting, filthy guy that just sat right in front of my house, looking like he was waiting for someone . I shouted, "HEY! GO AWAY YOU BASTARD, HOW DARE U STAND IN FRONT OF MY HOUSE . CAN U ALSO PLEASE GO TAKE A BATH OR SOMETHING? U STINK!" My friends stopped walking and stared at me with their jaws wide open .
Example 2:
Brenda and I were on our way to meet Chelsea to start on our project work project . Then, when we saw her, walked to her, exchanged greetings, we both started to smell something gross . And when Chelsea was leading the way, Brenda turned to me, frowned and pinched her nose . When we arrived at her doorstep, Chelsea, being the positive and cheery type of person, turned around and said, "hey, my house is kinda in a mess, so bear with it a little, yeah?" we both nodded our heads . I mean, from all the friends' houses I've been to, they always say that they're houses are very messy, I mean, it's just typical, I mean, how bad could it be? But to our horror, we saw filth and some cockroaches everywhere and a strong stench . I thought, "This is the worst place I've ever been to! oh my gawd -.-"
Just tell me, which is discrimination? which is prejudice? There's a big difference . But I tell u now, it's better to be prejudice towards someone than to discriminate someone, in YE, I remembered Auntie Kar Foon said that the Tongue, the power of the tongue, is strong . It can build one's confidence, or bring it down . It also applies to emotions . But not discriminating and prejudice is much better than to be prejudice against someone .
Both words have negative terms . They are Sin . the power of the mind and tongue . And now u know, how much u've hurt me . even though I hurt u the last part of the friendship . that'd probably last a few weeks . And who knows? U may continue to discriminate me on ur blog forever . But it's okay now, I'm never gonna visit ur blog again . Because whenever I did, all I saw was either a complaint or a discrimination about me .
I figured I could choose to make myself remain happy or become sad and have ur posts ruin my day . I pick the second option . I'm going my way now . shut up .
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